Lost in artificial reality.
I was going to rant about the disconnection between people I know and myself. Recently, state of emergency or no, I think i’ve become pretty disinterested or disconnected with people I actually know compared to things I see online. And then at another point, I’ve become disinterested in that and distant from that too.
At the moment, I’m at a loss at what exactly I’ve been up to. I mean, there are things that I’m busy doing, but I can’t remember when the change happened, when I suddenly realize I’m waking up to just move through the day like a ghost. So that when I try to remember what I did today, I can’t. It’s very disconcerting.
I conclude I’ve become lazy or simply bored. Or maybe I just can’t quite concentrate and put in the effort. Unfocused. I can’t describe with certainty what I am feeling.
So I’m at this point where I’ve decided I should work out what that means and then change that. For surely, I can’t just want to be what I am right now. So i’m trying to remember what I wanted.
I think, a lot of us get lost like this. We get busy doing whatever we’re doing and start to forget the original point and purpose for doing it. Then we might just see something one day that reminds us what that was. It’s at that point you ask yourself the question, is this what I really want? The thing that I did want, do I still want it now? What do i do now, go back, continue or change?
I’ll continue working at those questions. Try to break the little artificial reality I’m currently residing in and see if I can discover a new one.